I Can't Undo Yet I Can Do BETTER =)

 

BUZZ! Listen to this song while reading. Thanks :)) Happy New Year :*

    

     Time travels too fast. 2012 is my yesterday and 2013 is my today. Yes, it is :) 2013 is my new chapter. For life is my novel which is unpublished and most of all unique. I have created a new episode and I am ready to welcome new characters in my own play. Fresh end and of course, a fresh start. Beginning is the most important part of life. 

     "Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can make a brand new start from now and make a brand new ending."

     What's done is already done. Can't erased. Can't undo. But it can be changed. That's how life is. That's why a pencil contains an eraser for mistakes to be corrected. And that is how I always begin with new year. I foresee what had been done. Everything I'd done, either good or bad for me to know what is to changed and what is to remain. I always do a throw back from the past, and here I am considering things whether accepted or not. I am a woman who turned to be weak when circumstances came unto my way before. I am that someone who taught herself to cry when it is not carried anymore. I am that someone who missed herself and changed a lot, and get a hard time to revive the lost one. I always try to be happy. I always try to remain stable even my soul, my heart, and my mind just can't. I turned to be a total loser. I let myself to be that pessimistic and depressed. Once stumbled, I got hard time to get up. I kept on letting the past haunt me down. I am that someone who is very sensitive. I tried to be numb. To be deaf. To be blind. And the bottom line is, I did all those things because I am afraid to be hurt. I am afraid to feel like a total junk, trash and a total NOTHING to anyone. I am the one giving my all, not a part of me. Eventually, I am the one who receives nothing. Who turned to be worthless in the end. I really don't like to suffer that much. I pity myself. I do. 

     As the clock struck to 12 midnight, I am pretty ready to face 2013. I will face the year with me being strong enough to overcome things. No matter what comes along my way, I'd be standing still. Too brave to defeat all the odds. I will change for the better. I maybe weak last year but it doesn't mean I'd be weak forever. Changes do exist. I learned to give just a part of me and it's not good if I am going to keep on giving until nothing's left for me. I must love myself first than loving someone else. I don't need to be numb, deaf and blind to things which tells about reality. Hence, I must accept every single thing that happens in my life. For every thing happens for a reason. I maybe someone who loses herself, but that's yesterday. And not today. Not anymore. Circumstances shall bring me up and never be the reason for me to give up. I don't intend to continue this journey to be a total loser. I know I can stand on my own. I must be optimistic always to avoid wrinkles to show up in my forehead this early. I want to be happy and I need to DO it but not to TRY. Every intention doesn't always start and end as an intention itself. But it needs an action. An application. I won't let anybody make me cry. I've done it yesterday and I won't do it again this time. :)